If I buy my wife flowers for no reason, will she appreciate it or come to expect that sort of thing?

I want to make nice gesture, but don't want to give her reason to be mad at me if I don't read her mind and do something she expects. That happens enough already.

If I buy my wife flowers for no reason, will she appreciate it or come to expect that sort of thing?
Do it because it is what you want to do. If you do it on a regular basis, it's easy for someone to come to expect anything at that point...so make it an occasional "just because" thing.





As for mind reading, I've never understood why some chicks think guys should have that ability. She needs to wake up and get real on that one.





Nice gesture though dude...hope she likes 'em. ☺
Reply:She will always appreciate it! I think that if you start to get her flowers every Friday and then you stop, she will wonder if everything is okay. But anyone that is worth giving flowers to should be a person that is happy with or without. Gifts like flowers are a way of saying "I was thinking about you" just like when you get someone their favorite candy bar. So get her the flowers!
Reply:So will appreciate it.. As well as she treats you well too.. continue to do that and other special things.. People enjoy being spoiled. Enjoy the benefits.!!
Reply:I tend not to buy anything for my woman becuase then they start expecting things all the time. Just treat her good with your mind not your wallet
Reply:She will appreciate it and she should be able to expect certain things from you. It doesn't always have to be flowers, but nice gestures should be given on a regular basis. Of course you should be able to expect the same from her.
Reply:A woman's perspective....





To answer this question to any appreciable degree, one would have to know about your wife, you, and the type of relationship you have. Obviously, however, that is not possible in this forum. So I will have to make some assumptions. So, indulge me a bit here.





Is your wife a nice person? I don't mean does she never get mad at you but, truly, is she a good person at heart? Are you a good guy? A good husband? And do you too truly love each other?





If the answer to those questions is yes then, yes, your wife will appreciate the flowers and will not come to expect them. As a woman, when we get flowers we appreciate them, first, because they are beautiful. Often our day is filled with hard work, messy chores, lonely hours, and an exhaustive list of things we do to make others happy. And the beauty of the flowers reminds us that there is another world out there, of peace and calm, and serene beauty. And those simple flowers bring a bit of that world home to us in the middle of living every day life.





Moreover, flowers from the person we love says "I was thinking about you" or "I miss you" or "I really love you" or, best of all, "I really appreciate all you do." It's a romantic gesture from centuries past, practiced by lovers for hundreds if not thousands of years. And by receiving flowers we are, again, removed from the day to day and our love is transformed to one felt across the centuries, enduring, and ever after.





(Hokey? No. In fact, the only ones who truly ridicule such feelings are those who never felt them, or those who were really stupid and lost such a love.)





So, will she come to expect them? No. In fact, a guy who gives flowers all the time actually makes the gesture more meaningless. Funny, huh? But by getting them all the time they cease to be special. Kinda like a kiss given as a habit before leaving to work, where the guy may actually be thinking, or even looking at, something else while kissing his wife.





But, and I say BUT!, what your wife should be able to come to expect from you is that you will continually show that you appreciate her, whether it be that you do a chore without having to be reminded, that you make the bed without being asked, that you help with the baby and actually act like you're enjoying it, that you give her a romantic kiss (not sexual but ROMANTIC!) just because, and that one night you let her pick the movie, or the TV show, or whatever and enjoy it without comment or remark. All for her. And, in these ways too, you show how much you appreciate her.





Think about it from your own perspective. You work hard. You know you do. You have dreams for your family. Things you want to do to make everyone happy. You have things you give up for them. And every now and then, while in the trenches of everyday life, covered in the sweat and grime of traffic, and another long day at work, and "boy the boss is in a mood" kinda day, it would be oh so nice for her to say "Thanks for giving us a great life." In fact, I dare say, it would mean the world to you.





So, do the flowers. Do the laundry. Do the romantic kiss. Send her a love note tucked away where she'll find it when you are work. Remember what brought you together and, by doing so, it will keep you from ever parting.





And do it with a genuine heart. Kinda like when you were younger and your mom made you apologize, and you did but said it in a snotty tone, then she said "apologize again and this time mean it!" A gesture done without a genuine heart does more harm than good!





A good, loving, reciprocal love is easy. All you have to do is love without question without end. And it's amazing, when you give praise and appreciation and attention what you can get back in kind. Maybe even a wife who doesn't get mad at you for "not reading her mind."





Perhaps she's taking you for granted? Well, then be the bigger person and you start. You be the first to make the kind gesture. After all, that's what love is. It's not about "what can you do for me today" but about "what can I do for you today."





Lemme tell you. My husband loves to go flying. And even though work takes him away for long hours, so does this flying. A lot of wives are unsupportive when their husbands do this, nagging and complaining and making their husbands give it up. Instead, I fully support him, help pack great lunches, launch him into his full day away with smiles and a kiss. And I mean it, really mean it, when I say "have a great time." In other words, I give 'til it hurts. And, funny enough, what I get back is a kind, courteous, attentive husband.





In other words, I give therefore I get.





So, give. Give 'til it hurts. And I shall pray that she is a good woman at heart and, as long as you give the gesture in good faith, will hope she will answer it in kind.





Love her. Truly, madly, deeply. Dare to love like is written about and read hundreds of years later. Anyone can have an ordinary life. What makes life extraordinary isn't the number of people who can recall your name but the number who smile when they recall it!





(By the way, when your wife is upset that you didn't read her mind, what she is really upset about is that she shouldn't have to remind you that you love her, are a husband and, possibly, a father, and, as such, have responsibilities around the house that you should do without having to be reminded of like a three year old child.)





Good luck!
Reply:We should expect ourselves to do kind things for our spouses!
Reply:it all depends on how long you've been together and if you've ever gotten her something for no reason before.





My ex sent me flowers (after never doing it before in two years) and I KNEW he had cheated on me (I was right)





My husband now is always buying me little things for no reason so I wouldn't wonder about a thing if he just did it.





If you've never done this before... try sending a card that says "I know I haven't done this before but I'm trying to change and start to show you more how much I love you."
Reply:buy her a small bunch of flowers, not one of those big decorated bouquets ??
Reply:I think your intentions are twisted. If you loved her and wanted to do something nice for her, it wouldnt come with strings attached. And it certainly wouldnt be with the condition that she better not expect you to be thoughtful all the time.





Maybe theres a reason you already have this problem with her. Sounds like you're pretty selfish.





Love is about the other person. If you love her, you'd do whatever you could think of for her, no matter what. You wouldnt care how it effected you because you want her to feel loved.





You gotta give love to get it.
Reply:She'll Love it darling!!
Reply:lol she would appreciate it. The thing is, for me anyway, I only want my husband to do it when he thinks to and it comes from the heart. Having said that---I wouldn't want it to become routine. I like it to be a spontaneous and honest gesture. You should be able to talk to her about it at a time when you are communicating really well etc.


We made some promises when we got married and only now--21 yrs later---are some of the things we have invested in each other coming to fruition. For instance, a few years ago, my husband began to ask if I needed anything while he was up or out. I was really touched by this--especially after he was very consistent about it. Then, I began doing the same thing for him. It has brought us new respect and love for each other. There is something very loving about trying to anticipate another person's needs.


p.s. during that good communicating time---talk to her about the things on your mind. Not when you both are upset--that's the worst time. Tell her u want to please her but don't always know what she wants. Ask her to tell you. It's a very common thing. Women seem to ALWAYS expect men to read their minds---not sure why or where that came from. I never learned that---I let him know when our anniversary is coming or my birthday--by writing it on the calendar. A few weeks ahead of time and in giant letters. BTW u should show her this--that u asked this question.


GOOD LUCK!!
Reply:I think it's a very sweet gesture. The sweetest thing my boyfriend ever did was pick a flower in the park we were walking in and gave it to me. I didn't even know he picked it. It meant more to me than having a dozen roses sent to the office!
Reply:I would be surprised and then I would be like "what u did" but in a jokingly way. I know I would appreciate it. I'd be very happy. I say go for it. I would even write a little note!!!
Reply:She will appreciate it either way, but if you are always arguing and giving flowers then it gets to be too routine and common and then it isn't appreciated.
Reply:she'll love it...i think...i mean, i would... just dont do it often or she will expect it.
Reply:flowers die. waste of money. get her lacey thongs
Reply:well, if she's normal then she'll appreciate it, if she's psychotic then yea it might go the other way. Just try it and see what happens.
Reply:I think that she would appreciate it! If she doesn't something is wrong! I think she would only come to expect it if every friday you bought them for her and then one friday you didn't. Do it because you want to show her how much you love her and for no reason at all. (Not because you did something wrong) then she will expect it.
Reply:I think it is a nice gesture. She would appreciate it as a nice gesture as well. I guess.
Reply:She will think you did something evil, like a girlfriend.
Reply:She will appreciate it.... I would if my hubby did that sort of thing.... Do it because you love her and you wanna suprise her!
Reply:I'd set a reminder every 3rd or 4th month to buy some flowers for her. When the reminder pops up, think about it and if your hear reinforces the feeling, then go for it. But don't do it on a regular basis or too often - that kills the joy after a while and gets expensive. Go to proflowers.com if I may recommend a service....their flowers are beautiful, the bouquets are varied and you can do it randomly without spending an arm and a leg.